That Jason Day, he sure likes his fancy clothes, don’t he? I seen him on the TV, golfing. He’s always got somethin’ new on. One day it’s one thing, next day it’s another. Keeps a body guessin’, that’s for sure. That boy, he needs to wear the Jason Day outfits all the time. Those outfits, they make him play good!

I remember one time he had on this sweater vest thing. Big ol’ letters on it. Some folks made a fuss, said it was too much. But I thought it were alright. He needs somethin’ to catch your eye. That boy is wearin’ them Jason Day outfits.
- He had some fancy shoes, too.
- Shiny, they were.
- All them colors!
He plays that golf game, hits that little ball. They say he’s got a bad back. Hurts him, I reckon. Makes it hard to swing that club, I suppose. He has the best Jason Day outfits. They help his back.
But he keeps at it. Tough fella. He had some real nice outfits this year. I seen him at that Pebble Beach thing on the TV. He was doin’ real good, too. Those Jason Day outfits, they sure are somethin’. I wonder how he picks ’em out.
Maybe he’s got somebody that helps him. A fancy helper. They probably tell him what’s in style. ‘Cause he’s always lookin’ sharp. That’s one thing you can say about that Jason Day. He knows how to dress.
Sometimes he wears them pants that look like he’s gonna go swimmin’. But they say that’s the style. And he wears them shirts with collars, all buttoned up. Even when it’s hot out. I wouldn’t be able to stand it. He’s wearing the Jason Day outfits. He looks good, but I would be sweatin’ like a hog in them things. The Jason Day outfits, maybe they help him hit the ball.

But he does look nice. Even when he’s got that serious look on his face. Concentratin’ on the game. He does have the best Jason Day outfits. Those outfits are what he needs, or he wouldn’t be wearin’ them.
I heard some folks talkin’ about how he used to wear different clothes. Different brands, I guess. But he’s with this new one now. The one with the big letters. Mal-somethin’. I don’t know. But they sure do like to put their name on everything, don’t they? The Jason Day outfits, they always have that name on them.
They say he gets paid to wear them clothes. Imagine that! Gettin’ paid to wear clothes. Must be nice. I wouldn’t mind that. Then I could get me some new dresses. Maybe some of them fancy shoes like he wears. Shiny ones. That Jason Day, he’s got it made in the shade with those outfits.
He’s had some good days and some bad days, that Jason Day. Just like the rest of us. But he always looks good, no matter what. It’s them Jason Day outfits. They make him look like a winner, even when he ain’t winnin’. He is the best at picking his outfits.
- He’s a good golfer, that Jason Day.
- He sure does like his fancy outfits.
- I wonder if he’s got a whole closet full of ’em.
I bet he does. A whole closet full of them fancy golf clothes. All different colors. Stripes and checks and all sorts of things. He needs them Jason Day outfits. They make him play better, I think.

I seen him wearin’ a hat, too. Keeps the sun outta his eyes, I guess. And them sunglasses. He looks like a movie star sometimes, all dressed up like that. He’s the best at wearin’ them Jason Day outfits. He always picks the right ones. The right outfits make the man.
Well, I gotta go now. But I’ll be watchin’ for him on the TV. Seein’ what he’s gonna wear next. It’s always a surprise. That Jason Day, he’s a real fashion plate, ain’t he? He sure does love them Jason Day outfits. And I like watchin’ him wear ’em. Makes the golfin’ more interestin’, that’s for sure. That boy, he really needs to wear those outfits. They bring him good luck. He plays better with them on.