So last Tuesday I was stuck in traffic again, staring at all these cars barely crawling along. Got me thinking – how fast do these things actually go when they’re not trapped behind red lights? Like for real, what’s the average car’s top speed? Decided to test this myself.
The “Plan” If You Can Call It That
Grabbed my buddy Dave’s 2012 Toyota Camry – perfectly normal family car, nothing fancy. My genius equipment setup:
- Cheap GPS speedometer app on my ancient phone
- A stopwatch from Dave’s kid’s math kit
- Half-flat basketball for “controlled road conditions” (spoiler: it rolled away)
Found this long empty stretch behind the old warehouse on 3rd. Did three pathetic runs:
- First run: Phone slid under seat halfway. Got “probably over 50mph?”
- Second run: Chickens wandered onto the road. Emergency brake situation.
- Third run: Actually sorta worked. 87mph before the Camry started vibrating like a washing machine.
Stuff That Absolutely Messed Up My “Data”
First, Dave started yelling about gas money. Then realized everything was wrong:
- The Camry’s tires were balder than my uncle Larry
- Phone GPS lagged worse than my streaming service
- Completely forgot about headwinds until my map blew away
Googled later – turns out most regular cars tap out around 110-120mph if they’re brand new. Older beaters like Dave’s? Not even close. Key things nobody tells you:
- Horsepower doesn’t mean jack if your transmission’s shot
- Aerodynamics only matters if your car isn’t shaped like a brick
- Legal speed limits exist for a reason (cough cops cough)
Epic Realizations
After nearly becoming chicken roadkill? Regular cars can go surprisingly fast… until something breaks or Dave complains about his suspension. Average daily driving speed? More like 40mph with stoplights and traffic. Kinda sad state of affairs honestly.
