Okay so this started when I bumped into Mark at the coffee shop last Tuesday. He was all smiles, talking big about his new consulting gig pulling in crazy money. Sounded awesome, right? But something felt… off. His eyes kept darting around, never really settling on mine. Got me thinking – where’d that smooth confidence go? Used to be his trademark.
The Weird Stuff I Noticed
Right after the coffee chat, I started obsessing. Why’d it bug me? Dug into old texts and emails from him. Here’s what jumped out:
- The “Success” Smokescreen: Kept dropping names of huge projects, but zero specifics. Asked how he landed client X? Changed topic faster than light.
- Sudden Ghosting: Promised intro to a biz contact Friday. Radio silence. Monday morning text: “Bro, crazy weekend! Still down?” Classic.
- Over-the-Top Friendliness: His hugs felt weirdly tight, like he was selling me something. Laugh was just a split-second too loud. Fake.
Realized these weren’t just bad days. Lost confidence men swap substance for shiny noise. They over-promise because they can’t deliver. They dodge because they got nothing real to show.
My Dumb Test (And What Happened)
Wanted proof, so I ran a little experiment Wednesday. Called Mark about his “expertise” in AI tools – something he bragged about constantly. Asked a dead simple question: “What’s your go-to workflow for training models on small datasets?”
Silence. Then stammering. Then: “Oh man, it’s super complex, proprietary actually. Trade secrets, y’know?” Translation: Dude’s lost. No depth behind the buzzwords. His confidence wasn’t lost; it evaporated because there was nothing solid underneath. He’d become all talk, zero walk.
How I Handle Them Now (Simple Rules)
Okay, lesson learned. Made a few personal rules for spotting these types:
- Vagueness = Red Flag: If they can’t give concrete details fast, bounce.
- Trust the Gut Tingle: That “something’s off” feeling? It’s usually spot on. Don’t ignore it.
- Demand Proof, Not Promises: “Show me, don’t tell me.” Ask for a tiny demo or result upfront.
- Ghost the Ghosts: If they flake once, fine. Twice? Block button time. No guilt.
Since spotting Mark’s symptoms, I’ve bailed on three “too good to be true” collabs my gut screamed about. Saved me a ton of wasted energy. Real confidence comes from substance, not sales pitches. That’s all for today.