Okay, so the other day, things felt… messy. You know? Like my head was full of cotton and I was just drifting through tasks. Had this big meeting coming up, the kind where you really gotta be on point, not just show up. And honestly, I was dreading it. Felt like I was gonna fumble the whole thing.
I remembered this one time, years ago, totally bombed a similar situation. Wasn’t prepared, looked like I’d rolled out of bed, and just couldn’t get my thoughts straight. Felt like crap for weeks after that. Didn’t want a repeat. Absolutely not.
So, I decided to actually do something about it.
Woke up extra early that morning. Like, way before the alarm. The house was quiet. First thing, I didn’t grab my phone. Big step for me, usually the first thing I check. Instead, I just sat there for a bit. Tried to clear my head, which sounds easy, but man, it’s tough sometimes.
Then, the prep started. And I mean prep.
- Laid out my clothes the night before, sure, but I went over them again. Ironed the shirt, even though it was mostly wrinkle-free. Found the good shoes, gave them a quick polish. Stupid little things, maybe, but it felt… deliberate.
- Showered, took my time. Didn’t rush.
- Shaved carefully. Like, really focused on getting it clean. No nicks.
- Spent way longer than usual on my hair, just making sure it was neat, controlled.
Sounds vain, maybe? But it wasn’t really about looking pretty. It was about control. About doing something meticulously when my brain felt chaotic. Each little action felt like clicking a piece into place.
Got dressed. Stood in front of the mirror. And yeah, the suit looked fine, the hair was neat. But it was more the look in my eyes. Focused. Intense, maybe? Like all that fuzziness from before had been burned off. Everything felt still and ready. Like a loaded gun, maybe? Or yeah, sharp as a bullet. Ready to go exactly where I aimed.
Did it work?
The meeting went okay. Better than okay, actually. I felt calm, spoke clearly. Didn’t stumble over my words. Felt like I was actually present, not just physically there. It wasn’t magic, didn’t solve all my problems. But for that day, for that meeting, I showed up properly. Felt solid.
It’s exhausting, though, doing that level of prep. Can’t do it every day. Most days, just getting out the door is a win. But it’s good to know I can pull it together like that when I absolutely have to. Just gotta find that switch, you know? Sometimes it starts with something as dumb as polishing your shoes.